Selamat Hari Raya to everyone. (:

Saturday <3.

I'm running out of words.
Bye world.

Tick Tock, Tick Tock goes the clock.

Yes, it's coming nearer and nearer. Half of me is fear and half of me is confidence.

That's all i can say.
I shall go sleep and wake up early tomorrow to meet Kel and Hidayu.

Bye WORLD.



















NOPE, I WON'T GIVE UP.

Exhausting Wednesday.

Just emailed Mr Ong my 'words' essay. I took 1 hour to finish an essay. 1 HOUR! ): !

It was a great downpour in the morning. Everyone was shivering and complaining. Haah! A nice weather to sleep, trust me (some of my classmates did sleep though).

Let me see the time, 10.54 pm. I'm still awake? Suppose to be snoring at this time. Haah! I'm tired though. I couldn't study anymore for today. My brain just told me, "I need rest." (: ! Indeed, i need rest together with my brain. Yeah!

No one is at home except me and daddy. I'm bored. YAWWNN!

Y.A.W.N.N.N ....

Sleepy.
Yes, sleepy.

Oh, i just realise i'm left with 3 pathetic bucks (or less). I'm goind to be cash-less soon! I will only like regain 10 bucks next week and earn GREEN PACKETS. (: ! Haha. The moment i've been waiting, GREEN PACKETS. Money here i come! haha.

I think i better get going people. My eyes are shutting down anytime.
Bye world. Will update real soon. Night night.













I HATE THE MISSED CALL I HAD LONG LONG TIME AGO.

2nd post for the day. Yes, it's rare for me to post 2 times in one day. Well, what can i say? I'm bored. I need a break from Maths Focus.

I'm still in class. No, i'm not alone of course. Here with me is Andrew, Kelvin, Bing Hui, Shi Han, Rui Xiang, Yee Ting, Crystal, Shanaaz and Hidayu. None is revising as everyone of us is claiming that we need time for a break as we'll be back at work at 6 pm. (: ! 1 more hour to go.

I'm sitting blankly infront of the dusty and laggy computer in my class.

This is boring. Very. Tick Tock Tick Tock goes the clock. However, 6 pm seems to be a long way still. I'm exhausted. Extremely. ): !

Again, i'm blank.

Still blank.
Yup, still.
YES! B.L.A.N.K !
Still!
Empty.
Still.

Okay, i better get going, dearest Yee Ting is asking for the computer. Bye WORKLD. (:

Good afternoon Tuesday.

Yes people, i'm in school. No doubt i'm using the class computer. Blame me? Go ahead, but i'm bored. Haah!

Waiting for dearest Mdm Ho to step in the class and starts our official Maths focus. Starting in half an hour time. I'll be staying here in class for 2 hours. Endure hidah, endure. After maths focus would be chemistry night focus. I'll be exhausted man! Oh god, i need to hold on for 23 more days. No, in fact longer. ): ! Trying hard to survive now.

Prelim results are out. I'm happy with the results cause there's imporvements though there's moderation. Oh well, i should be thrilled with the humoungous improvements i made comparing to my term 3 results (which was dreadful). At least i don't have to disappoint my parents just like how i did for my term 3 results. I'm glad.

Tick Tock Tick Tock. Time is flying. Yes, every seconds is driving me nearer to O levels. I'm working hard, revising every night. And, totally neglected enjoyments! How much i had sacrifice! I will and i must give O levels a great bang and impressed every single individual out there that i can withstand myself and achieve what i've been wanted all along. Yes, especially under my parents, boyfriend and close friends aegis. (: !

Hidayu is sleeping, Ashraff is studying hard perhaps catching up with what he had missed a few days back. Yi Ming is calculating certain stuffs while me? I'm spilling my every words in my mind to you. (: (: !

There's so much to do actually. And so much to explain and so much to type but i'm running out of time. I'm left with exactly 20 minutes before mdm ho enter the classroom. So people, i better get going. Bye!





23 MORE DAYS TO O LEVEL-just like how it is stated on the class white-board.

A very good morning to Saturday.

Yes, i'm awake. At 8.35am. (:

Yesterday was a thrilling day for me. I've told myself that i had no worries anymore to art paper 1. The idiotic coursework. Haah! I'm flashing my pearly whites.

I hated results. I must do well for O levels! I must. Pray for me. I'm left with 30 more days to O levels, it's a survival stage i must tell you. I will swim through the current and i will survive. I promise!

Let's hit back to my life.

Nothing much was happening though. Just that i've not been seeing boyfriend for 2 days and i've not been replying to any messages or answering any calls from him or anyone. I know he is mad at me however he tried to hide it. It's no use. I will know if he's hot under the collar (like hello, it's been 2 years 1 month i'm with him). So, correct me if i'm wrong. Still i know i'm right.

Okay, i think better get going now. I need to complete Frederick's homework and hit my revision.

Bye world.












SINCE YOU DON'T CARE I WILL BE MORE NON-CHALANT.

Good morning Wednesday.

I hate yesterday. I hate the fact that i had to complete the coursework and give school a miss today. If the girls can make it to school, why can't i? I hate myself for missing school today. And i promise, this is the very last time i'm giving school a day off till O levels end.

Art is vanishing tomorrow. It's like finally. I know i won't be scoring as well as i thought i would be but i can't help it. I've told myself that giving up now won't make any different. So, i gave up and do whatever i can do. Now, i predict everyone must be hating me for what i am doing especially Mr Tan. I mean, eventually effort won't be counted in the grades. It's the skills and the toning and etc. I hate this! What's over is over. I can't rewind everything and be the good girl i used to be again. *SCREAMS*.

How can i turn my life into a clean piece again? I'm engulfed with fear, guilt and disappointment. A whirlpool of emotions struck me. Someone, help me. I'm drowning in my own deed.

Let's ignore this art thingy which is almost leads me to jumping off the building. ): !

Well, it is exactly 5 weeks more to O levels. Indeed, time flies very fast. I need to rush my revisions and etc. I just text projONE about my worries. There's no reply yet. I'll wait. O levels, i really need to give it a BANG! I will and i believe i can!

Things i realise this week(ranked):

1. Art coursework is coming to and end.
2. I shouldn't rush when i'm doing my mathematics papers. Especially when i have 2 hours to complete it.
3. I should start doing my tuition homeworks.
4. I can do well in any examinations if i had checked my papers after i'm done.
5. I've been a bad girl towards art.
6. I should stop playing!
7. My dearest kor is attached now. (:
8. I've lost.
9. I need money.
10. Hari raya is coming.

I typed enough. GOODBYE world.

FALLING UNDER EVERYONE'S AEGIS IS JUST WHAT I NEED.

Friday starts early.

Took 105 to school today. I just don't know why but i'm hating the Mass Rapid Transport (MRT). I would be super lazy to drag my feet to the MRT station. So, bus is my transport now. (: !

Today's paper was combined science MCQ, it was fairly done i suppose. It was super lucky me that Miss Lim went through the organic chemistry topic with me yesterday. (: ! After papers i thought i would want to meet mdm ho and asked her about my marks. However, i was thinking what for if i know it will be dreadful? So, i went back home.

Mama was super surprised that i reached home super duper early today. Haah! I admit it was seriously early. Told mum that i was tired. Instead of giving me some chance to sleep, mama drag me along to Clementi to accompany her to the supermarket. SAD! I did though. Bought things and off home. Get my sister's things as she is in the hospital.

At home, after returning from getting my sister's things at the hospital, i fall asleep unintendedly. My sleep was so awesome. HAH! My initial plan was to sleep for an hour or two. I did the otherwise. Slept for complete 4 hours. Mind you. Complete 4 hours! Woke up, bath and break my fast. HAAH!

Day ended with going back to the hospital. I miss my sister like thiiiiisssss much! I miss crapping secrets to her. It's her birthday tomorrow and it just means, she's a year older! Haha. 33 i think? LOL! Buying her an ice cream cake tomorrow. ): !

**Tomorrow morning i will message Zenia up. Meet her and get my canvas.
Tomorrow noon will be going to the hospital to fetch my sister home from hospital.
Tomorrow night will finish up the tuitions homeworks.

And Sunday will be PAINTING!

That's all folks. Bye WORLD.

SO IT'S MY FAULT? THAN MAKE IT THAT WAY CAUSE I DON'T FUCKING CARE.

Thursday is better than i thought it would be.

Morning was as usual. Went to school and sat for my POA prelim paper 2. It was horrible, i admit. No it isn't that horrible. Maybe? I don't know. All i know now is i really need to stop those fucking nonsense and irrtating computer games i've been playing after my studies every night. Kana sigh lah!

Anyway, after papers met my long lost niece. HAAH! Slack at her house and i actually made her a 10th month anniversary card for her lao gong. It was a simple one though. As long as she's happy with it, i'm more than happy. Slack at her place for like zillion hours. Haah! Played uno stacko, chit chat and blah blah blah.

Reach home around the evening. Bath, breakfast and tuition. Tuition was great today. I loved today's. I just love looking at my tuition teacher, she's pretty can? Haah! No, i aint lesbian okay? Haah! I like the last conversation i had with her.

Hidah: Miss Lim, you are a Uni student right?
Miss Lim: Yup. And the notes are crazier than yours.
Hidah: Stress lehh!
Miss Lim: My exams are coming too.
Hidah: OH NO! Yours will be worst.


Tonight was so awesome can?! I was messaging baby. And i suddenly told baby that i feel like drinking green tea. He suggested that he would buy for me. I was like, even if he buy for me how the hell am i going to take it from him? He called me and ask if i need any other tibits and i say no thanks. He called again and i found..

..a bottle of green tea as soon as i opened the door. So, touched. I mean for most people there it's dumb lah. It might be nothing but to me horr, it's like so big thing lahh. Instead of flowers, it's a bottle of green tea. How creative. HAA! Anyway, thanks baby. 我爱你。(: !

Last, i hate MSN today. I couldn't log in. I wanted to ask Unc Ronald the song that he wanted me to download anyway. But.. SAD! Kana sigh. MSN sot liao. Haaiis.

Okay, i guess i better get going (: !

BYE world!

Hello Wednesday.

I'm so craving for ruffles. Buurrgh. I want ruffles ruffles ruffles! Will be going to the shop bahh? And, there goes my 10 bucks that i've been saving for week. HAH! Never mind. (: !

Anyway, i'm alone at home tonight. So, i have the room all to myself. Wahah! (: !

Okay lah i think i better get going. BYE!

blah blah.
blah blah.
blah blah.
blah blah.
blah blah.
blah blah.
blah blah.
blah blah.


Literally i mean, i'm bored. (:

Day started late for me.

Briefly, today isn't my day. I freaking dislike today. Boyfriend is angry at me. I know. Text him so many times but there's no reply. Maybe he's asleep or maybe he just need time to cool himself down or so. But still, i'm waiting for his reply.

Well, day isn't really that bad afterall i suppose. Watch movies all the way and did a little touch up on my canvas. Then. memorise a little of geography and back to internet to blog.

Life has been seriously crampy for me lately. I don't know why i felt the cramps now. Maybe because of the coming O levels or maybe it's because i've been always disappoint boyfriend by cancelling every plan i had with him. It's either this two. Well, life is not only cramping in the sense of time but also some other problems which i think i should keep it to myself. I'm afraid by saying it all out, i might hurt any of you readers though.

I think i better get going now. I'm still hoping for a message from boyfriend. Waiting.












IF ONLY I COULD SAY THOSE WORDS TO YOU THEN THIS WON'T BE SO COMPLICATED AS IT IS NOW.

If i said i'm about to give up this relationship,
You will run to me and hug me.
"Please don't let go," that's what you will tell me,
You look into my eyes and say that you love me.

If i said i don't trust this will stay for long,
You will take my hands and look into my eyes.
"Trust me, you're my baby," that's what you will tell me.
You kiss my forehead and say that you love me.

If i said i'm afraid they won't like me,
You will stop walking and hold my shoulders.
"It's about me not them," that's what you will tell me.
You put my hand on your chest and say that you love me.

If i said i can't be there with you,
You will dial my number and talk to me.
"You're with me now and forever baby,"that's what you will tell me.
You will sing me a song and say that you love me.

If i said i'm feeling sick,
You will put me to bed and hold my hand.
"Please rest baby," that's what you will tell me.
You will watch me sleep and say that you love me.

If i said i need you,
You will be right here and smile at me.
"All yours now baby,"that's what you will tell me.
You will kiss me softly and say that you love me.

If i said i love you,
What will you do?
What will you tell me?
Will you say you love me like you always do?




(: !

ARGH!

Give me some more time. I need more time to survive this painful journey now. ):